In my work with couples, I use Emotionally Focused Therapy, in which I have had extensive training. Couples seeking counseling to improve their relationships find this method a very beneficial approach, as it helps people better understand their own emotional responses and those of significant people in their lives. In my work with couples, I help facilitate the creation of secure and lasting bonds between the partners to create security, closeness and connection in their intimate relationships.
Emotionally Focused Therapy is based in attachment theory, which is the concept that people are healthier when they have emotional closeness and need to feel safe in their connection to their partner. In EFT, it is believed that when intimate partners are not able to meet each other's emotional needs, they become stuck in negative patterns of interaction driven by ineffective attempts to get each other to understand their emotions and related needs.
In therapy, I help couples reconnect and begin to understand each other's important emotional needs and insecurities in the relationship. With this understanding, they can begin to reconstruct their relatonship, by learning how to respond to each other in a more romantic, loving and emotionally connected way, resulting in a more secure attachment.
Emotionally Focused Therapy has been studied extensively and scientific research indicates that couples who have particpated in EFT show a marked decrease in distress in their relationships and continued positive effects of the treatment after therapy concluded.
Emotionally Focused Therapy is a series of approximately 8-10 sessions. This can be extended if necessary.
As a faith based counselor, I also integrate the biblical principles of marriage in my couples sessions if the couple is faith based.
In addition to EFT, I utilize tools and scientific assessments from the Gottman Method of Couples Therapy. John and Julie Gottman's work in the study of marriage, has provided proven methods of increasing intimacy in marriage and defining ways in which a couple can easily change their behaviors to create more "love connections" and less arguing and fighting, by identifying the destructive behaviors such as the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse; Critisim, Contempt, Defensiveness and Stonewalling. Couples learn what is contributing to the breakdown of the marriage and learn ways to turn "towards" their partner, rather than "turn away." The outcome is healing broken hearts and repairing loving connections. I am trained in the Gottman Method Level 1, Level 2 and Level 3.